I think about 3 weeks ago, Alexius has became very difficult at milk feeding times. He'll either struggles and then refused the feed half thru' feeding or he'll just bite the teat of the bottle and then not continue drinking. I am really at my wits end with him. Now I really hate milk feeding time with him. Not really sure what is the reason or are the reasons to this irritating behaviour... could it be that his concentration span is short? He doesn't like the taste of the formula milk that i mixed with the breastmilk? Or teething? Yes, I checked his mouth and found that there are 2 white spots on his gums where the big hind teeth supposed to be. I hope it is really due to teethning... Urgh!

There have been a couple of occassion when I really couldn't control my anger and frustration. And these episodes really made me so down that i think i am either going crazy or my blood pressure is hitting high on the scale. Not only it upsets me, it has also frightened my poor darling Gaby...

I really would want to control my emotions but really, sometimes it's just uncontrollable. Where can I get help??? What kind of help can I get? I really need it... I hate the feeling of being angry... And this made me unable to enjoy my time with the kids... Why is it that I am always left with doing all the shitty work and solving all the problems and the rest enjoys the fun of it?? I guess this is what motherhood is all about...

My darling Gaby and Alexius... sorry if there are times when mummy seem to be crazy... I will think of a way to make things better...