Why you so like that har?

I really dun understand Alexius sometimes. Why must he be so difficult leh? I was supposed to go for training tonite. Was so looking forward to it. Even Gaby was looking forward to a nite's out meeting his doggie friends. We (as in Gaby and myself) had it all plannned out. We reached home early after getting his new MRT/bus card at Tiong Bahru so that I can feed Alexius his dinner early and then give him his milk earlier. All well planned. BUT... I really dun know what went wrong with this plan.

Feeding Alexius dinner was a bit of struggle. I had to entertain him with all kinds of things... toys, my purse, coins, switching on differnt tv programs... it took me almost half an hour to finish feeding him.

Then came milk feeding time. I nearly went crazy! He took 1 bloody hour and did not finish his milk. Then he mad me so mad that I started scolding him. And the scolding made him cried and cried and cried till he vomitted all the milk that he had drunk before. This made me even madder. Can u imagine this, spending 1 hour to feed and then vomitted out?? By now, I was so mad that I ditched the idea of going training. And anyway, it was too late already. By the time i reaached training ground, i think all my fellow trainees will be getting ready to pack up and go home!

So fed up! Why this has to happen? Formula milk really taste so terrible meh? And you know what? After resting for about half and hour, I gotten a bottle of breastmilk ready. The moment Alexius saw the bottle, he was so happy and was shrieking with joy "milk milk time!" Finished the bottle in less then 10mins!

How I felt about what happened? I feel really bad. Am so angry with myself for losing my cool and scolded Alexius. Am so angry with myself that we have to cancel training. Am so guilty that I after scolding Alexius, my dear little boy can still come to me with his arms wide open and telling me "hug hug mummy". But am so glad that Alexius seems to have already forgotten all the scoldings. At bedtime, he wanted me to lie down beside him... giving a few hugs and also telling me that "I love mummy".